I’m pretty new to sex work. I still find it difficult to ask for what was agreed. I’m currently on a trip away from home with a client I’ve known for 3 months and met with twice. I’m starting to get the impression he’s not wanting to pay for what was agreed. He’s on a business trip and leaves me in the hotel room most of the day with no money for food or getting around so I’m basically stuck in here. He has also been avoiding talk of the amount discussed for me coming out here for almost two weeks… Does anyone have any tips on how to bring it up nicely? I don’t want him blowing up in my face and being stranded in a state I know nothing about.
UPDATE: He got back and I got half today. Getting the other half on Monday. But it did take a long ass conversation and him jumping through hoops trying to manipulate and saying he thought I was “different”. Also got a separate room because I needed to cool down. Still contemplating leaving this weekend and counting my losses
- You just got to rip the band aid off and say hey I need the money upfront so for this to continue as I can’t stay here with the uncertainty. If you want me here 24/7 you will need to pay extra for my food and to keep myself busy while you’re away as I cannot stay cooped in a room all the time. He either straightens up and pay or you’ll see that he’s a timewaster just trying to get as much unpaid as possible.
- He is trying to manipulate you because of your inexperience. “I thought you were different”? No. You’re a provider. He’s a client. A conversation does not need to be lengthy nor delicate simply state your requirements and establish boundaries as far as time given and service to be offered. Next time this along with a deposit should be established before your trip. Rule number one – get the money first. Count it and secure it. No money. No honey. If I were you I’d be looking for the second half at least two days before the anticipated closure and searching out alternative return flights as you may need one.
- I say this lovingly; you need to work on asserting yourself. There are shitty people who will target new sex worker because they’re not sure how to stand up for themselves. Start working on an escape plan if he won’t pay you.
- You didn’t get paid first? Your being scammed…if you can afford it just leave he’s not paying you if he hasn’t already ALWAYS get paid first
- How much have you been paid so far? A lot of escorts don’t do long trips or bookings without a significant portion paid up front, if not the whole thing. How to respond depends on your answer to my first question though. If you haven’t been paid anything yet, then that is a worse situation for sure.
- You don’t do anything until you are paid and then you do what you agreed to do! We always get paid first! We all run our own shows but unless you work for an agency or a brothel you get paid first! Looks like you are stuck until you get home! Play sick and refuse to put out any further! Get a text saying you must get home to a dying relative tell him to fly you back ASAP.
I am also a sugar baby and to me this sounds way more like a sugar arrangement. if you are paid to be waiting at the hotel for when he gets back he needs to give you EXTRA money for food. just order room service though and have it charged to the card the room is under. He needs to give you your money first though. ask for immediately when he is back. If this is leaning more towards sugar arrangement and he isn’t taking you out he also needs to give you extra money for activities. if it is not then bottom line is he needs to give you the money now and extra for takeout/ understand you will be charging room service to his card.